—Ejpanglishiao by Don Jibaro—
‘Twas
the Night Before Crijmas y en to'ita la casa,
Not a
chango was stirring —¡Caramba! ¿Qué pasa?
The nenes were
tuck’d... away in their camas,
Some in calzoncillos and
some in pijamas,
I hung
all the stockings con mucho cuida'o
So that Santa Clós
ejtuviera obliga'o
To bring all the children, los buenos
y malos,
A bag of marrallos y d'otros regalos.
Out in
el Batey, alguien se echó un grito
Yo me levanté
like a scared cochinito.
I ran to the window y miré pa’
fuera,
¿And who in the world, te creíste que era?
Was Santa in a sleigh with a big yella' pava
Came dashing
along, gordo como ejtaba.
Instead of venados pulling his
trineo...
He had ocho burros y to’j eran feos.
I watched as they came y el gordito hombre
Was
shouting y así los llamaba por nombre:
“Arre Papo y Tato,
echa Cuco y Beto,
Vuelen, Chato, Moncho, Pompín y
Anacleto!"
Then
standing erect... la mano en el pecho
He flew to the top
of our very own techo.
With his big round belly, cual
pote ’e jalea,
He struggled to squeeze in por la chimenea,
Then huffing and puffing, se calló en la sala ,
With soot smeared all over su traje de gala,
He filled
all the stockings con lindos regalos
Because the
muchachos hadn’t been muy malos.
Then chuckling aloud, felíz y contento,
Took the "juyilanga..." veloz como el viento.
But I heard him
say... y ésta es la verdad,
—“Ya es Crijsmas,
Boricuas... Felíz Navidad!”—
A Sand Juan Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through San Juan,
The Mayor was crabbing, that Trump just had won.
A Star Wars Christmas 1
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the ship,
Hans Solo with Leia, were having a kid.
A Star Wars Christmas 2
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the
Empire,
Darth Vader
was warming, his hands on the fire.
A Hippie's Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the pad,
There was nada happenin', now that's pretty bad...
A Baby Christmas
'Twas a holiday eve and the babe was asleep,
Swaddled tight in his crib he made not a peep...
A Dieter's Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas and all round my hips
Were Fannie May candies that sneaked past my lips...
A Rapper's Christmas
YO! the night B4 Christmas, I'm shootin' your house,
y'all...
With AK-47s just to get a mouse.
A Florida Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through Miami,
No Cubans were frozen, all eating Salami...
A Gambler's Christmas
'Twas the nite before Christmas, I hit the Casino,
I went there to play, More than just Keno...
A Genealogist's Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
Not a soulmate was stirring, not even my spouse...
A Mom's Christmas
It was the night before Christmas, when all thru the abode
One creature was stirring, cleaning the commode...
The Night Before Chanukah
'Twas the night before Chanukah, boichiks and maidels
Not a sound could be heard, not even the dreidels...
A Redneck Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the trailer
Not a creature was stirrin' 'cept a redneck named Taylor...
A Star Trek Christmas (I)
'Twas the night before Christmas on the Enterprise-D,
On a routine short stop down Starbase 23...
A Star Trek Christmas (II)
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the bridge
Spock was not buzzing, he's gone to the fridge...
A Texas Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas, in Texas, you know.
Way out on the prairie, without any snow...
Peace and Prosperity!
donjibaro@gmail.com
This is the bottom line
“Live in such a way that no one blames the rest of us
nor finds fault with our work.” —(2 Corinthians 6:3)
Jibaros.Com®,
Jibaros.Net® - ALL content is Copyright © by Orlando Vázquez,
owner-designer and com does not accept any responsibility for the
privacy policy of third party sites